Jennifer is out of town so I had to take the girls with me to a doctors visit.
Doctor: “Are you allergic to anything?”
Kathleen: “Yep, just mom.”
Doctor: “Well all husbands are allergic to their wives.”
Me: “Oh. No. She doesn’t mean I am allergic to my wife. She means my wife is allergic to some things.”
Doctor looks at me. Pauses. “Sure.”
My girls love butter, so when we use butter in cooking, we give each of them a small slice to eat. While making Mac n’ Cheese tonight, Kathleen and Lucy came out to remind me to call them out for “butter time.” I responded “BUTTER TIME?!?” and then did my best impersonation of an MC Hammer dance move. Kathleen and Lucy responded by laughing their heads off, which, notably, is the appropriate reaction to me imitating MC Hammer’s dance moves.
I, however, assured them that I was not just crazy. Mommy, I told them, would know what I was doing. So we all marched to the living room, where Jennifer was seated on the couch petting Clyde, our cat. I announced that our girls thought that I was silly, but mommy would prove them wrong. We told her that she needed to do the appropriate dance when I said “BUTTER TIME!” Jennifer, however, responded, “Sorry, I have a purring cat on me.”
The next minute was constituted by Kathleen and Lucy imitating my imitation of MC Hammer while laughing their heads off. The next five minutes was constituted by my dancing like a fool any time Kathleen or Lucy said “BUTTER TIME!”
I am now exhausted, but at least butter time is over.